This weekend Humboldt Park will be compiled of enthusiastic rock fans dressed in their best cut off band shirts and denim to hear a jam-packed three days of amazing music. If you want a music fest that is free of obnoxious bros decked out in neon, then Riot Fest is definitely for you. College News will be there to bask in the punk rock/metal glory and here are the top 10 must see/must do activities at this year’s Riot Fest.
“Container 9” Haunted House
Yes, you read that right. This year Riot Fest will be showcasing a full throttle haunted house. Because rock is best served with a bit of horror (ask GWAR), Zombie Army Productions will have a bloody house of horrors to really bring on the chills. Zombie Army Productions is responsible for amazing horror events like Chicago’s Zombie Prom and the Fear at Navy Pier attractions, so we already know this is not going to disappoint.
As mentioned before, horror and rock make for a tantalizing recipe and GWAR does this best. If you want to see large amounts of prime man ass in a thong while being sprayed with large amounts of fake blood, entrails and god knows what other (hopefully fake) bodily fluids then this is a must see. Who knows what celebrity sex tape star they will disembowel for you this year. With the very unfortunate death of Dave Brockie earlier this year, it will be interesting to see what a GWAR with none of it’s original members will be capable of.
Pussy Riot Panel Moderated By Henry Rollins
The Pussy Riot panel will definitely be a must-see with the two formerly jailed members of the feminist punk band, Nadya Tolokonnikova and Masha Alekhina, discussing sociopolitical movements and many other important issues. Moderated by the controversial Henry Rollins, this will be a key point of the weekend.
With lead singer Perry Farrel not even playing his own mega-fest Lollapalooza, we know that he has something really big in store for Riot. It was also announced that the band will be playing their album “Nothing’s Shocking” in full, which will be a huge treat for fans.
Slayer will also be playing their album “Reign in Blood” in full, which means the entirety of Riot Fest will most likely turn into a thrashing moshpit and College News promises to be smack dab in the middle of it.
The Pizza Underground
This is a fucking band fronted by Macaulay Culkin, that covers The Velvet Underground Songs, but changes the lyrics to be about pizza. WHAT ELSE DO YOU NEED TO CONVINCE YOU?!
Wu Tang Clan
Wu Tang Clan was at last year’s North Coast Fest in Union Park and when you see that many people (and even babies) decked out in Wu Tang gear, you know you are witnessing something legendary. All members of the Wu’ (sans the late and great Ol’ Dirty Bastard) are expected to hit the stage, which will make for a massively classic performance.
The Flaming Lips
Sparkles, giant vaginas and Miley Cyrus are just some of the things that have previously made a Flaming Lips performance, so I wouldn’t expect this to be any less of a spectacle. Although, I hope they leave Miley at home because I would fear for her safety at Riot Fest.
Despite the fact that “Surrender” may be one of the best classic rock songs EVER, Cheap Trick are masters of touring, with nearly 40 years of consecutive touring under their belt. Their shows are still super high energy and outdo most young musicians these days.
Maybe I am bias because I am a diehard 90’s kid, but Weezer is just one of those bands that you can’t NOT like. In addition to Slayer and Jane’s Addiction, Weezer will also be playing the entirety of “The Blue Album”