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Dating your classmate: a good idea?

Editorial Staff

Ways to make classmate dating doable

We’ve all been there. You’re sitting behind a girl or a guy in your class, you get a chance to admire his feathery hair, or her elegant shoulders, or a really nice butt. That one is genderless. In a situation where you’re forced to interact with people of all different shapes and sizes, it’s no strange thing to find yourself attracted to someone. And again, it’s no strange thing to want to do the no pants dance of romance with the person in question.

But wait a minute! What if things don’t work out? What if it’s just a one night stand? What if you don’t “perform” well enough? You’re doomed to an entire semester of awkwardness, constantly wondering how this person with the hair, the shoulders, the beautiful butt, is going to handle the whole situation! How are YOU going to handle this situation? Do you carry on like normal? Can you even look them in face?!

Are you crying? I’m sorry. Really, I am. But dry your tears, and maybe I can help make things easier:

My first bit of advice on the subject of hooking up with a classmate is: don’t do it! I know, I know, it seems contradictory.

Perhaps I can better explain myself with a story: I walked into my first day of math class in the second semester of my junior year. I was the opposite of excited. But I meet a girl (let’s call her Katie), we joke and flirt, we do the Facebook thing, and soon enough we were hanging out in her dorm room. One thing led to another, and we started a sexual relationship. Things were going fine, but suddenly…she began to get clingy. And jealous. And spiteful. And fat. Not really. But the relationship spiraled into nothingness the way any relationship does when presented with those issues.

Herein lay the problem: we still had a good half semester of math class left. Sure, I played the “be absent as often as possible” game, but Katie refused to talk to me. Or look at me. And in a classroom setting, that’s not only noticeable, but extremely annoying. How am I supposed to figure out the cosine of a triangle by myself?! Needless to say, it was awkward. And all our classmates knew it.

But you’re not the type to be scared by that story, are you? You want to have your cake and eat it too, don’t you? You’re wondering how that’s possible, aren’t you? Well, there are a few things you can do. For one, do NOT bring your real world relationship into the classroom. Wait until those moments when everyone walks to the elevator or across campus, and do your flirting there. The fewer classmates who know about your sordid little classroom affair, the better. That way, there’s no desire (on either of your parts) to keep up appearances.

Another thing to watch out for: make sure the other party can HANDLE a casual relationship, and its end (if it comes to that). Before you ever touch each other, keep an eye out for tell-tale signs: does he call you six times a day? Does she keep saying “I like you” every other sentence? I think you get the picture. The biggest thing in a casual classmate sex-romp is maturity. If they’re going to go all “high school musical” on you, you don’t want any part of it. Not even the butt.

That’s about the extent of advice I can give, other than: Good luck, and don’t screw it up. And if you do, don’t come crying to me. Cuz I warned ya.

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