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Why you never got them back

Editorial Staff

Some people try to get their ex back the wrong way

Be honest with yourself! Making an attempt to recover a past relationship is a very hard task, especially if the first time ended badly. However, with a great deal of confidence and flexibility, it is possible.

When you feel like giving up on your relationship, ask yourself how you may have been approaching the situation incorrectly and modify your actions. According to Yangki Christine Akiteng, Toronto’s number one love doctor, many people fail to realize that they are handling their relationships improperly.

Certain actions actually cause more distance between you and your desired partner. To rekindle your relationship, Akiteng has developed a guideline of aspects you should avoid. In fact, there are certain factors you should avoid like the plague.

The “Ill change or I’ve changed move.” Many individuals make the mistake of believing their ex partners want to hear that they have changed. However, this move screams desperation, which is never attractive. With an ex there is either an abundance of over sensitivity or insensitivity. Therefore, the ex is already suspicious of your actions and resistant to what you have to offer as a partner.

“I want us to have a better relationship.” If you are serious about earning your ex’s heart back, you have to put yourself in his/her shoe. Consider that statement. If you could not form a better relationship before, what makes you think your ex will believe you are sincere in making it work now? In actuality, your ex doesn’t want to hear that either. Ambiguity will make them reluctant to trust you.

“I have suggestions that may improve the relationship.” “Good luck with that! Your ex may listen attentively but next time you talk to him or her, they still say there is ‘something missing’ or they ‘don’t think it will work,’ Akiteng said. This is a result of former resentment from a damaged relationship. If your ex is still angry and aggressive towards you for any reason, everything you suggest will be shot down immediately.

“I just want to be friends.” You may assume this statement seems harmless because it would allow you to openly communicate with your ex while keeping enough distance to rekindle what was lost. However, your ex may assume that all you really want is to just be friends. In the end you only make it harder for yourself because when you attempt to get back together he/she may throw it in your face or feel deceived.

Now, you may be thinking it may be best to say nothing at all, just to be safe. Unfortunately, not contacting your ex at all will hinder your chances of getting back together as well. Mind games are not appealing to everyone, and your ex may either be turned off or play along to teach you a lesson. The wrong approach and strategy can potentially push your ex further away. Winning your ex’s heart is a huge challenge, however, it is possible. By being optimistic and flexible you may be able to accomplish the task.

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