The sun’s warmth is weakening and fallen leaves begin to crunch beneath your feet; that pumpkin spiced latte couldn’t come round sooner. A new college year is about to begin and you’re excited to get to campus, decorate your dorm and get stuck in—there’s just one thing. Your summer love is still on your mind and you’re both still talking. Could this ever be serious? You ask. If you both want it, totally! We say.
Holding on to summer love is worth trying when you become more interested about your love interest’s favorite novel than how good their hair looks in that Instagram photo today. College News gives you some pointers on how to develop a stronger connection and give this “relationship” thing a go.
Find Common Ground
While it is healthy to have different opinions on things like politics or sports in any relationship, strong relationships are usually bonded together by common ground. Perhaps you love the same band, you’re both keen foodies or you both love the movies. Common ground takes regular conversation somewhere a little more profound; you can learn a lot from someone talking about their passions.
If you’re going to be spending more time with your summer love, you’re going to have to—eventually, at least—also spend time with their friends and family. Meeting new groups of people can be daunting, but your relationship becomes more of a breeze when their family and friends also like you—trust us! Psychologytoday.com says, “If you want people to like you, make them feel good about themselves.” So try this simple trick out, tag along to that dinner party and chat to your sweetheart’s grandma.
Communication is Key
The U.S. of A is a big place—huge, in fact, and there is a high probability that you may not both live in the same state or that you might go to different colleges. Luckily, technology in the form of messaging platforms and face-to-face calls make communicating a doddle. Set times in the week in which you can both dedicate for a catch-up and laugh-out-loud session to break up studying (laughing relieves stress, don’t you know?)
Real-life contact is also important to any thriving relationship, so arrange a weekend each month for some quality time with your summer love.
Accept that it might not last
Even if you follow all of the above advice, you might not entirely feel that spark that you expect from a relationship—and that’s totally okay. Sometimes a summer fling is just that; a summer fling. It can be difficult to stop all communication with someone you’ve been hanging out with for a while, but the key is to express your feelings in an honest and direct way and make that break amicably. Breakups don’t have to be all that sad; think about all that pizza you don’t have to share anymore!