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Sex & Dating

Is this the real kind of love?

How to determine if this relationship is “the one”

We love to love and we love to hear stories about people in love, right? How do you really know if the relationship you entered is actually one for the books? One that they should write a book about and then cast the hottest Hollywood A-Listers to portray your love on the big screen sort of thing.  Well, there is no real measure because we all seek different things from a relationship and we all define love by different standards.  There are however some inclinations that you may be the modern day Rose and Jack from James Cameron’s Titanic, you know minus the iceberg and all.

1. When the two of you are around other single friends or family members, you see the wanting for a relationship stare, and it does not even shock you.  You know what the two of you give off when you are together and love is insanely infectious.  The love bug does not discriminate so if you give it to others around you, then your relationship is something that is admired by others.

2. You’ve made the least monogamous person in your clique actually try serious dating.  They have heard your daily stories of how happy you are and how great you work together that it kick starts something in the friend.  They might go to Tinder, but that’s ok.  In the modern World where we live on the internet, dating via the Internet is very normal.

3. When you are retelling a story from your love book, everyone listening in simultaneously sighs AWWWW, and you’re like what? What did I say?  You have become so accustomed to your life and your relationship, you’ve forgotten the heartache.  There is a lot of negativity about love and it stems from all of the hurt others have gone through.  If you can get a reaction by just saying minor almost irrelevant details about your relationship, then you’re in a good one.

4. When another couple hangs around you, they try to hold back parts of themselves in front of you, so that they are not viewed as the problem relationship.  Some couples stand out, it is their mannerisms and the way they communicate publicly with each other that a2. You’ve made the least monogamous person in your clique actually try serious dating.  They have heard your daily stories of how happy you are and how great you work together that it kick starts something in the friend.  They might go to Tinder, but that’s ok.  In the modern World where we live on the internet, dating via the Internet is very normal.

5. Before when you were single, you used your job, projects, and friends to occupy your time.  You don’t lose contact with these people and you still work hard to get ahead, but there is a new calmness about all of it.  You are comfortable and confident enough in your relationship to say to yourself, Nah I want to be just be with him/her without thought.  You don’t feel like when your with them that you are missing out on something else.  You are in total zen.

6. You remember the days his or her public relationship status was a deal breaker for you? Well, if you find yourself not really gravitating towards the opinions or “comments” of others, on how happy your relationship is, then it is most likely valid.  When something is missing we feel the need to make up, it may be with witty captions or the perfectly staged “We are so in love” selfies together.  The truth is happiness needs no outside validity.  You are not trying to prove anything anymore so when you do post couple-ly Instagram pics you are actually sharing the love with others.  It is obvious to others when two people are in real love, the actions will always speak louder than, well, the likes.

7. Every relationship has problems and arguments and if the title of this post made you feel like that isn’t true, then honey you are lost! Perfect much like happiness is independent to every situation. Meaning, what makes me happy might very much make you sad and vice versa.  What is perfect to one may be intolerable to another. The way you argue or have fights is one of the greatest tells of the health status of any relationship.  If you both have no issues with having a little spat at a friend’s dinner party or an intense standoff during a shopping trip, then your in a strong relationship.  This kind of relates to what I said in number 6 but this is more for real life and not your social lives.  The less you care about the outside opinions especially when it is revealing intimacy, because I believe even the way two people in a relationship resolves issues is intimate, then you know you have a strong foundation for love and longevity. 

 

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